Decoy catalog

The fake work screen, ranked

A static screenshot fails the six-foot test the moment someone lingers. A believable fake work screen has to move — terminals scroll, comments appear, charts recalculate. Here is every decoy we ship, ranked by believability.

#1The spreadsheet (fake Excel)

Universally legible as work. Numbers imply diligence; a half-filled column implies you were interrupted mid-analysis. Nobody asks follow-up questions about a pivot table — they're afraid of being assigned to it.

Exposure risk: Low. Unless your boss is in finance, in which case they may lean in and try to help.

#2The code editor (fake VS Code + terminal)

A scrolling terminal is the strongest single signal of productivity in the modern office. Non-technical observers physically back away from it.

Exposure risk: Low for non-engineers. Moderate if a real engineer squints at your dependency tree.

#3The document in review (fake Google Docs / Word)

Tracked changes and margin comments read as collaboration — you're not just busy, other people's work is blocked on you. That's senior-level busy.

Exposure risk: Low. The comment bubbles do the heavy lifting.

#4The slide deck (fake PowerPoint)

A deck mid-edit implies an upcoming presentation, which implies stakes. Strong against managers; they recognize the genre instantly.

Exposure risk: Moderate. Someone may ask when the readout is.

#5The design file (fake Figma)

Frames, layers, and a cursor with someone else's name on it. Excellent in any org with a design team; reads as deep work.

Exposure risk: Moderate. Designers will know. Designers always know.

#6The fake Zoom call

The nuclear option. Headphones on, gallery view, a participant mid-sentence. You are not just busy — you are unavailable, which is better.

Exposure risk: Higher ceremony. Commit to the bit: nod occasionally.

All of these are one keystroke away

Open the simulator, press \ and your screen flips to any of the decoys above — animated, not a screenshot. Press M for the fake Zoom call. Free, no signup.

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Gear for the professionally busy

Disclosure: Some links in this section earn us a commission if you buy something — at no extra cost to you. The gear is real even if your busyness isn't. FOMOgear is our own store. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases.

FOMOgear — the official merch

Shirts and accessories from our sister site. Wearing the brand of a fake-productivity simulator to a real office is the most honest thing you can do. (We own FOMOgear — that's the disclosure.)

A serious-looking wireless headsetaffiliate link

You are never not on a call. The mic boom does 90% of the work; the call is optional. Pairs with the fake Zoom feature (press M).

A second monitor (or third)affiliate link

Nobody has ever asked a person with three monitors what they're working on. Each additional screen adds roughly 40% perceived workload.

A desk notebook you'll never openaffiliate link

For carrying with purpose. See tip #4 in the field guide: the destination is irrelevant if the notebook says 'stakeholders.'

A standing desk converteraffiliate link

Standing reads as urgency. You cannot be accused of slacking while visibly enduring ergonomics.